Oh Happy Day!

Contrary to popular belief I'm not as mean spirited and misanthropic as you might think. As a matter of fact, there are really very few things that I hate. And there are even less people. Of course when I do hate something it is that white hot, seething type of hatred that takes minutes off of your life when you experience it.

Michael Moore is one of the people that I hate. I despise that fat piece of shit in a way that any sane or rational person could not possibly begin to comprehend. These feelings stem from having to watch Roger and Me in a sociology class in college. The class was an introduction to popular culture but was really just a showcase for the pretentious grad student who taught it to drool over the subversive nature of punk rock. He was European and had that thinly veiled contempt that only a douchebag European hipster can muster. But I digress.

While watching Roger and Me, Moore's cinematic love note to his blue collar roots in Flint, Michigan (which, incidentally is not even his home town) and scathing indictment of the evil General Motors corporation, I couldn't help but think that there was something not quite right about the points he was making and the way he was presenting them. But whatever. He was just some bloated douchebag with a camera. No need to worry about him. This was the summer of 2002 and boy was I wrong. He would win an Academy Award less than a year later for Bowling for Columbine and that disgusting glob of shit would spend the next seven years making shit up, putting it on film, and claiming it as fact.

It was after I decided to sit through Bowling for Columbine that I realized that the shit he had in that movie could not all possibly be true. It was just too far fetched to be believable. So I did some of my own homework to check out the veracity of Moore's claims, specifically about Charlton Heston and the NRA. I also looked into some of the drivel from Roger and Me about GM CEO Roger Smith. Now, it is one thing to use statistical data to make a point. That's what statistics are for. And for better or worse you can use them to draw conclusions that are not necessarily true. But it is quite another thing to just make shit up using photo shop and clever editing, and present it to the public as gospel. It takes a special kind of scum bag with a profound lack of integrity to pull the shit that Michael Moore has pulled for the last two decades.

Which is why today is a great day. It looks like Moore is finally going to retire from "documentary" film making. Of course his reasoning behind getting out of the documentary game is almost laughable.

"Two years ago, I tried to get the health-care debate going, and it did eventually, and now where are we? We may not even have it. What am I supposed to do at a certain point?"

What a self righteous ass hole. How important does this fucktard think he is? You had nothing to do with the current national debate about health care you whiny, lying, manipulative fuck. What he's basically saying is, "Whoa is me! I've tried so hard. But one man can only do so much!" Get fucked you fat piece of shit.

The irony is that Moore wants to continue his career directing fictional pieces like his John Candy masterpiece Canadian Bacon. You didn't know he was the director of that jem did you? Well he was. And he wants to go back to producing fictional pieces. Which, of course, if laughable considering that's what he's been doing for the last twenty years. Good riddance you worthless, pathetic, oxygen thief.