A friend forwarded along this letter to the editor in the Daily Collegian, Penn State's student run newspaper, and I'd like to give the FJM style of ridicule a shot. Ahem.
As a vegetarian of five years this November, I am very offended by the Oct. 2 column "Columnist Makes Oct. Meatless," in which the author promises to follow a vegetarian diet for a month, "just for the hell of it."
Happy 5th anniversary, ass hole. Of course you're offended by someone drawing attention to your lifestyle. You must be one of those self-loathing vegetarians, sequestered in your apartment, hiding under a blanket enjoying your tofu and soy milk.
First of all, vegetarianism is not something you can choose to dip your toes in. To a lot of us, it's not a choice.
First of all, yes it is. You were very clearly not born a vegetarian. In the very first paragraph you said you've been a vegetarian for five years. As a junior in college you are probably 21.
We were born to be vegetarians. It's insulting to me that the core of my lifestyle, something over which I have little control, is thought so idiotic that it is subject to the passing whims of others.
A whim is defined as "an odd or capricious notion or desire; a sudden or freakish fancy." Having a job as a columnist and coming up with an idea for an article is not a whim. It's an idea that is thought out and then exercised. A whim would more accurately describe your arbitrary choice at the age of (probably) 16 to become a vegetarian.
I wouldn't have been nearly as offended if the author were more open-minded going into it.
Yes, you would have.
It is self-limiting to consider something to be "ludicrous" just because you've never experienced it before.
Man,If only there was a way for someone who holds that viewpoint to experience the lifestyle of a vegetarian and potentially change his viewpoint while educating others.
In fact, this implication is a personal mockery my intelligence, as well as of that of millions of people around the world.
No, it's not. It's a mockery of your lifestyle choice. A lifestyle choice which you apparently have no faith in considering your argument is that his premise is offensive and not that more people should give it a try. Oh, wait, is this the only appearance of rational thought coming up? I think it is!!!
The truth is, Americans should be embracing vegetarianism, especially in the midst of the obesity epidemic.
On average, vegetarians have lower BMI (and no, were not wasting away into nothing), lower cholesterol and a longer life expectancy than those who eat meat.
Oh, no, I was wrong. There was promise, but oof, he sure did miss the mark. The truth is, portion control and a healthy balanced diet with exercise is what helps you have a low BMI, healthy cholesterol levels and a long life expectancy. You cannot make a statement that vegetarians as a whole are more healthy when they do not constitute a representative portion of the population. Let's take the healthiest one percent and the least healthy one percent of each group and stack them up against each other. I'm pretty sure the results would show that meat does not make you less healthy and that a vegetarian lifestyle does not automatically make you healthier.
In conclusion:
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